What you need to do is to find an editor. They can fix all that for you and give you writing tips. bad news—it may be expensive, but not all are, especially one just starting out. If there’s a writing club near you, you can join and maybe meet someone there who can recommend one.
I knew a woman who was not a writer, but she had a story. She wrote it by hand in a spiral notebook and showed it to someone she knew who worked for a publisher of law books. I can’t remember the details, but after an editor worked on it, it wound up being published by a major publisher.